Are you more of a reserved type? This more or less marked shyness complicates your day-to-day life. Here are 7 keys to help you overcome your embarrassment.
Don’t define yourself with a «shy» label. Stop seeing yourself as reserved and others will not see you as such. Of course, that is easier said than done. Remember: don’t victimize yourself… Because by projecting this shy label to others, they return this image of you. Did you get the idea? Especially since it is not definitive, so do not classify yourself like that a priori. Just being aware of it can help you.
Use it as a success factor. Make it an asset. In general, when we are shy, we are quiet. Show your serenity! When you don’t dare to speak, you inevitably listen… so listen, you necessarily have this ability… suddenly you will react more accurately than someone who talks all the time and has no time to think. what he is saying Make others talk, ask questions, take an interest in the person… the weight of the spotlights will no longer be on you and it will give you a breath of freedom…
It is an easy key to put into practice on a daily basis (practice again and always), to go a little further. And then, it will create habits in you. You will do the hardest part with this little trick…. In any everyday situation… ask! Create this habit. So, in the restaurant, in the self-service, when booking a hotel, when shopping… ask more often… After a while, speaking spontaneously will no longer scare you!
You have the right to self-train in extreme cases! “I am stronger than my shyness.” “I managed to talk to him”… “I have to give my point of view” “I go to this bakery and meet everyone… Hi, how are you? you smell good… what a great week… To talk to your inner self, there are 4 rules to follow:
1) Say I, ……
2) Speak in the present tense as if it were already acquired (not, “I WILL BE more comfortable” but “I AM comfortable here”… …….
3) Avoid negative turns of phrase like no…no more…example: «I’m not at the bottom anymore»… but «I’m getting ahead now».
4) Prohibit the words of doubt «maybe, eventually… I’ll try…
This attitude is usually magical in some people, because you sign a pact with yourself…. and your mind changes little by little!
It is enough to speak for us to finally listen to you. You just have to get close to someone to meet her… You just have to dare to open this door to enter the room… The more you educate yourself to take the first small step and interact with others, the more comfortable you will feel. Nobody is shy alone in their bathroom, or in their room…. no, one is shy in a social setting. Try to spend more time with people, even if it means trying a little… The hardest part is the first step! A simple «Hello!» is enough to go to someone!
When you’re shy, you have this propensity to focus on this state of immobility… your discomfort. Forget yourself a little and focus your attention on something. To get out of this statue position during a party for example: check out what you could do: take photos of the party with your phone, it will force you to talk to people to make small groups (and they will talk to you), yes she likes children… go take care of them, ask if she can help… (to cut the bread, bring the bottles to the table…) The mistress of the house will love it… feel useful…
It is best to remain natural and spontaneous, but you can also anticipate a situation to live it better, without being too shy. Nothing prevents you, for example, from preparing 2 or 3 topics of conversation related to current affairs or an area that may be of interest to your interlocutors. Prepare gestures or attitudes. «I always have a glass in my hand or my phone for consistency,» says a shy ex-man. Choose someone you know well… to help you talk when you don’t feel comfortable… One last thing? Never stand in front of the busiest part of the room. This way your field of vision is restricted and more reassuring.
